From Victim-To-Survivor. A Conscious Choice.

This section is about moving from Victim-To-Survivor.

This is an action step., and a change in mentality.

Yes, you are a victim of sexual abuse., but a victim stays in a victim role and never moves further and changes any behaviors that might change the outcome of the feelings that you are suffering from.

You can't change what happened to you..but you CAN change how you will react to it and how you want your life to be from this day forward!

Once you make the decision to recover, you have the power to change your life!!

Your abuser does not have to win! You can take back your power and move on and not stay stuck where you are!

First of all, to do this, it is important to understand the abuse cycle.

It clarifies how you stayed in your abuse and how you got to where you are now. abuse-cycle It is also important that you know how to deal with your overwhelming emotions that you might be experiencing when painting Art-therapy, or anytime.

One of the most difficult for me and one of the most powerful emotions is ANGER.

Moving from Victim-To-Survivor requires ulilizing some techniques to release you feelings. The page on ANGER gives you some concrete methods to use.

Feel free to check out the page on

when it is overwhelming, it can be helpful to use some of the exercises I mention on the page there.

Journeling also helps a great deal. So does talking to others and support groups. The method I describe on my page is a hands-on method that worked for me after everything else I tried just wasn't strong enough to release the amount of anger that I was carrying inside.

It is also important to engage in some type of therapy when moving from Victim-To-Survivor such as the art-therapy I used in my recovery. When utilizing ART THERAPY, You don't have to paint, you can also make collages if you wish..which is also an easy thing to do.

That is just pasting pictures on a large piece of cardboard that remind you of your abuse or anything that triggers something inside of you.

The key in Art Therapy is the PROCESS. The process itself is what moves you along.

As it says above in the logo, Empower yourself! Assert yourself! Encourage yourself! Re-define yourself! and, most of all, Believe in yourself! You CAN DO IT!! but it requires action or movement on your part.


art therapy specifically, acryllic painting (that is what I use) is wonderful because the paint free flows on to the canvas and there is something freeing and releasing about slinging paint on a canvas!

You DON'T have to be an artist!! It is just a process and it doesn't matter what your painting looks like as far as if it is "good" or not. There is no "good" or "bad" in art! It is just and expression of yourself, that is all!

To me, the most important parts of recovery are: healing you inner child and how-to-forgive mainly for yourself. It is a truly healing process, but does take action.

Grieving your loss of innocence is also important. Why?

This is important in order for you to move on, grieve your loss of innocence and childhood and embrace your inner child who was denied the childhood she deserved.

Moving from Victim-To-Survivor is just a choice..but a choice that requires you to take matter how scary that might be. I know that many of you feel alone. I know that I did! Truly, you are not alone, ever! Number one, God is always with you!

Number two, I am with you here, on this site, and by email,

Number three, you have thousands of sisters in recovery that feel the same way or have felt the same way that you do right now!

That may be difficult to believe..but it is true. I get emails all the time of women telling me that they don't feel so alone anymore after visiting this site. I have recently placed a message board on the first page of this site for you, my sisters in recovery to leave messages of hope to eachother. PLEASE use it. Someone has to have the courage to be the first.

I am sad every time I read one because I KNOW how it feels to feel alone! Like you are the only one who has ever gone through this indescribable pain. It hurts so badly that some days you feel that you can't go on for one more minute..but you do. Your world feels very small when you feel alone..but when you reach out, your world becomes much bigger.

The shame and the guilt can keep you alone and a prisoner. You CAN let go of those feelings!

You have more strength than you even know! I promise you that!

You have the power to do this! It is inside of you!

Easy? no, Worth it? definitely YES!

ASk God for help, your friends for support, join a support group, a church group, heck, I had my two cats for my support a lot of the time along with my friends.

Many women ask me if it is it good to have a pet? That depends upon where you are in your recovery. If you are angry, you certainly don't want to take any anger out on your pet! Only you can make that decision. For many people, pets are wonderful to have in recovery!! They provide unconditional love..which you probably need pretty bad right now!

For me, my pets were a Godsend! My pets were my support for quite a while! Of course, I was better able to take care of them after I made the choice to move from Victim-to-Survivor!

Do you have to do all of your recovery at once? Absolutely not! Recovery is a neverending process. Take it at your own speed. It is not easy to move from is painful at times, joyous at times, frustrating at times and a whole bunch of emotions.

However, it is the needed step for you to take back your life!

You can do it! I know you can!

I will be here with you as you move on.

Any questions? Email me. Use the links I provide for support, and call a professional if you feel you just can't make it on your own!!!

Peace to you and congratulations for choosing life in recovery if that is the choice you make.

If not, come back when you are ready. This site will be here.

Look up books here on sexual abuse such as "The Courage to Heal" both in book and audio, $9.99 and $5.99, "The Missing Peace" $5.49, "Beginning to Heal" $3.99, "I Never Told Anyone" $4.99, "The Spider and the Fly" (All different types of abuse) $4.99, and "Set Free" a spiritual perspective on recovery $5.99. All books at are 63-64% discounted! Look and see for yourself!

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