Scarred

by Kelly

All I can see when I close my eyes is your blank stare
When you looked at me you had no soul
You struck me once, twice, many times more
All because I didn’t want what you wanted
I say no one time and this is what you do?
You held me down and said I will kill you
You said just like Lacey, now I know how Scott felt
You’re not leaving here alive, I will rape you and kill you
Then I finally get you to look in my eyes
There you are again, its you and you start to cry
I seduce you so that all of this will be over
I don’t want to do this, but I know it will save my life
So I give you what you want and I feel so ashamed
The sun rises my body full of bruises
All you can say is I’m so sorry I will never drink again
But how can I trust you after what you did to me
I feel like I am all alone
Lost, afraid, judged, confused, scarred
Was it all worth that 15 minutes of pleasure?