Do You Know....?

by Briana
(Florida)

Do you know what it's like to live with fear?
To be afraid every day and know you can't escape from here?

Do you know what it's like to wake in the morning and know that nothing you do today will be right?
To pray that you will be good today and not cause another fight?

Do you know what it’s like to wake in the morning knowing you will be hit, no doubt?
To know that if today is a "good" day, you'll only get a couple of slaps but if it's a bad day, you could find a hand around your neck, shutting off your windpipe until you almost pass out?

Do you know what it’s like to stare into those evil eyes who laugh at your pain?
To hear how you deserve this, it teaches you a lesson, or it’s only a gain?

Do you know what it’s like to be stuck under a pillow, struggling to breathe, fighting so hard for one breathe of air?
To hear her f-ing voicing yelling “I am going to kill you” while you give up, forgetting to care?

Do you know what it's like to hear words such as "you're a bitch", "you're stupid", "no one will ever love you", “you’re a piece of shit”?
To hear these words so often you believe them and never think you’ll make it?

Do you know what it's like to feel as if every breath you draw is a waste of oxygen?
To feel as if suicide is the only option?

Do you know what it’s like to think you are so useless that even when you attempt suicide, you fail?
To try so hard, through hell, to continue to prevail?

Do you know what it’s like to be so terrified you hide for your life?
To pray dear lord you won’t be found, to escape that scary knife?

Do you know what it’s like to have to hold still in the pain?
To not flinch or move a muscle and to stay sane?

Do you know what it’s like to have your face inches from the heat?
To beg to live one more day, and not to get beat?

Do you know what it’s like to freak when you see the color red?
Because it reminds you of the scariest night of your life, and you can’t get it out of your head?

Do you know what it’s like to want to die?
To cry everyday thinking why? why?

Do you know what it’s like to see someone you love hurt you?
To not want to believe the memories because they can’t be true?

Do you know what it’s like to re-live the past in your head?
To hear her f-ing voice and everything she said?

Do you know what it’s like to be so scared you’d rather die?
To pray these memories never happened; they have to be a lie?

Do you know what it was like to be me?
I hope this poem will make you see,
I wish you were dead; you’re dead to me!
I hate you so much; I am so glad I’m FREE!

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