A survivor, not a victim .......

i am 32 y/o have two children with two different men. they are 7 & 11. they are my life, i love my girls with all my heart. well whats left of it.

i was 7 y/o when i was first abused. my father made me touch him and he touched me. after that night he would continue coming into my bed room at night and making me touch him and he would touch me. he would tickle me and only tickle me in my privat aress. his clothes were in my room and wvery time i was in my room he would drop his towel and change right in front of me and make me look at his private part. i grew to hate my father and was scared to be around men. i kept my secret for 12 years. never planning on telling anyone. but it came out that it happened to my brother too. so b/c of me keepint my mouth shut i allowed someone els to get hurt. so i had to act and stop him. i thought for all these years that i was the only child that he hurt, but through my story coming out i found out that at least 2 others, one bofore me and one ater me had been hurt. he had to be stopped and i was ready to put him behind bars. so i told my story for the first time to a stranger at the court house and then two years later he was standing infront of a judge and looking faith in the eye!!!

he received 35 years in prison and i hope he never sees the outside of those walls again. he hurt me and other children and he took my innocence and i can never get that back. i have ruined great relationships b/c of this and i didnt deserve this. everyone please keep your children safe!!! watch for signs and if yousee signs dotn stop asking ?s until you get answers.

the signs:

disconnects from a certain person inf the family.
starts being a shy person
starts having nightmares
doesnt want to take baths
starts touching themselves
starts acting out in school
starts wearing pants to bed, if she is used to wearing gowns (thats what i did)

these are a few. please parents dont be scared to be there for your kids and protect them!!!!!!!!

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Nov 25, 2010
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You are strong.
by: Anonymous

I am sorry you had to suffer for so long. It is true that some parents dont know the signs. And all parents should. I am glad you were strong enought to face it and put him in jail. I was not strong enough for mine. I was 5-10 and i had to stand in front of a judge and the man to tell them and i could not do it. He was not the only one to hurt me. I have been raped, tortured for 11 years straight by different people that were suposed to keep me safe.

Your story shows how strong you were to face it. I am proud of you and hope you have a happy life.

Aug 27, 2009
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You are Great!
by: Vee

Thank you for sharing your story with others. We can gain much hope from the healing of others.

Your list of things to look for is very helpful. We all need to be aware of these possible changes in our children. I am sure that others will find this information very useful.

Please don't blame yourself for the abuse that others suffered at this man's hands. He is the one and only to blame! Even if you did not tell...YOU are not to blame. YOU were a child..a scared child. He was the adult..the person who should have been protecting you and his other children.

I am sooo sorry that this happened to you...I am proud of you for telling and for sharing your story with others.

thank you!

Sending you hugs of healing! :)

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